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Since we created racism some white people have taken it upon ourselves to come up with new and creative solutions to racism.  The following list of solutions to racism is a result of the first ever whites-only anti-racism teach in. These strategies are under no circumstances to be used in tandem or as part of a larger scheme of social change.

  1. Patience – Soon we’ll all be mixed and it won’t matter
  2. Political Correctness – No one says anything racist and tah dah no racism.
  3. A T-shirt Campaign – Also buttons, ribbons and posters then a parade all with the slogan “Say no to racism”. Once the event is done so will be racism.
  4. White Feminism and White Marxism – Racism will be solved after non-white folks help us deal with our oppressions.
  5. Patience – Progress is inevitable.
  6. Legislation about Structural Racism – This lets white folks feel individually un-implicated in their day-to-day racism. We like feeling unimplicated makes it easier for us to end (or just ignore) racism.
  7. Cultural awareness – Some white people will go on vacation and ‘learn’ about non-white folks until there is no more ignorance and therefore no more racism.
  8. Affirmative action – This is to be done without any education campaign that negates its further necessity by actually talking about the racism that makes it necessary and ensuring that people understand why it is in place.
  9. The Sepp Blatter magical handshake – Only Sepp knows how this works.
  10. Patience – Hold on it is not the worst strategy we’ve come up with.
  11. Tone policing – Because all the bad racists are angry if we are all polite racism will go away or at least be less bad.
  12. Colour-blindness – If we all pretend that melanin isn’t a thing, no one will notice people who are being racist and we’ll live as if there is no racism. A lot of us white people have been practicing this effectively for over a decade.
  13. Social Integration – Remember how slavery ended when the slaveowners met the slaves at a dinner party? We’ll try just having everyone meet each other and that should end racism.
  14. Patience – We have to finish our academic critiques before we do any risky action.
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5 thoughts on “White People Anti-Racism Strategies

  1. Pingback: White People Anti-Racism Strategies | HaifischGeweint

  2. white people are all illegal in north america and should leave my land immediately you poor broke diseased melanoma cancer!

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